how it brought deeper awareness to my empath journey
For me, the past year was full of ups and downs. I would have weeks of profound spiritual connection, experiencing deeper peace and near-instant manifestation, followed by weeks of emptiness, dullness and a dreadful sense of separation. I wondered if this cycle was being influenced by cosmic forces, or maybe I was picking up on the collective ... caught up in the ebb and flow of others' energy. It could have been a bit of each (and there were a few days I thought I might be Bipolar), but eventually I realized: I was doing it to myself — I was 'spiritual cutting'.
Many of us at some point have been 'cutters' — physically, emotionally or spiritually — doing something we know is bad for us until we reach a point where we are forced to change. Although I didn't see it at the time, I was neglecting my spirit-self — literally cutting myself off from spirit — (skipping my daily energy work, working through my scheduled meditation time, or pretending that the treadmill was just as good as a hike in the woods). As days passed, my spirit light dimmed, followed by my physical, mental and emotional energy. When I started to feel desperately low or when I got physically sick, I would completely immerse myself back into my spiritual routine until I felt connected with source energy once again. Realizing I had caught myself up in a cycle of Connection / Separation shed light on my path of spiritual growth — and I had a real "aha–lightbulb" moment when I understood WHY I was doing it...
Why? Because I wanted/needed to fully embody the contrast.
Spiritual teachers, ancient and modern, demonstrate how the mountains and valleys of life are the catalyst for personal and spiritual growth; and how contrast is necessary to identify what we want versus what we don't want — to feel the value in polarities. If we want to know happiness, we must also know sadness. If we are to live in a state of gratitude, we need to experience lack. It was easy for me to recite that lesson. I understood it intellectually, but I was living it unconsciously. So here's what I have learned through my year of spiritual cutting:
Scroll down for a journaling exercise !
With great love,
This exercise can help you recognize when you might be creating your own contrasts, and in that self-awareness, make choices for your highest good. Draw a line down the middle of the paper. Label the left side "low" and the right side "high". Jot down situations that stand out for you that were particularly low OR high. For example, a high might be: 'an evening of deep intimacy with my partner'. Now consider if there is a contrasting low to that event. Perhaps it is: 'had terrible fight with my partner earlier that evening'. Not every low will have a high and vice versa, but the exercise is intended for you to consider how you participated in creating these contrasting situations and explore what you might be getting out of it.